If your job isn’t a dream, you’re not doing it wrong - redefining career success in real life

Find your passion. Make it your job. Wake up excited every morning.

Nice in theory. But in real life? It’s not always that simple. Especially when you’re juggling kids, caregiving, life admin, or just trying to figure out what’s next.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for meaning and thinking big. It’s easy to get stuck and give up on a version of ourselves that’s still in there, waiting. We don’t want to settle or tune out completely. But the pressure to “find your thing” can become so overwhelming that it backfires. It paralyzes us. And it can make us feel guilty for choosing something that’s steady, practical, or simply works for now.

My own not-so-dream job moments

It’s 3 AM. I’m at the reception desk of a TV recording studio, trying not to fall asleep. Not long before, I’d finished my psychology degree. And now? I was doing a job that had nothing to do with what I studied. It was boring. I was clearly overqualified. But the economy was rough, and I needed something. So I made it work. I used the quiet hours to update my CV and apply for jobs. A few months later, I was hired by an HR company, and things started to shift.

Years later, the same thing happened in a different way. I’d just quit a job I liked to build my own business—yes, this one - then COVID hit, and I was pregnant. So I helped with my husband’s side travel agency gig. Not my dream. Not my field. But it gave me purpose, structure, and income in a moment of uncertainty.

What did both seasons have in common? They weren’t ideal. But they were intentional. Well...sort of.

They helped me get where I needed to go, even when I didn't see it at the time.

Real lives, real choices

In coaching, I hear this often. Not from people who’ve given up, but from thoughtful clients who are making intentional decisions for the season they’re in.

Their stories sound like this:

“I’m a mom of two. I have a remote job in a field I know. It’s not thrilling, but it’s flexible, it pays, and it doesn’t drain me. That really matters right now.”

Or:

“I’m changing careers. Or just getting started. My job isn’t perfect, some boring tasks, not amazing pay, but it’s a foot in the door. I’m heading in the right direction.”

Or:

“I’ve recently moved countries. I needed something that pays the bills—even if it’s not in my field. It’s not my dream job, but I’m learning, meeting people, and building a new routine. For now, it gives me a sense of direction while I figure things out.”

These stories aren’t flashy. But they’re real, and they make sense.

You don’t have to be apologetic for doing something that requires some compromising. If anything, it shows your strength, your endurance - the ability to make choices with care, and stay focused on what matters.

Smarter than you think: how we actually make decisions

Traditional economics assumed that people were rational maximizers: always choosing the best option with perfect logic, time, and information. That model doesn’t reflect real life.

Herbert A. Simon, a Nobel Prize-winning psychologist and economist introduced the idea of “satisficing.” “Satisficing” is a combination of “satisfy” and “suffice.” People don’t make perfectly rational decisions, because we don’t have full information, unlimited time, or computational power - Simon argues. Instead, we make reasonably good decisions based on the limits we face.

A small reflection to try

If you’re not sure where you stand right now, take five minutes for this:

1. List everything that makes sense about your current job.

Think things like:

– It’s a stepping stone

– It’s flexible

– It pays the bills

– I can quit anytime

– It fits around my family

– I’m learning something useful

– It gives me time for other parts of life

2. Then write down what’s missing.

Maybe it’s:

– Creative flow

– A sense of purpose

– Feeling part of a team

– Recognition or challenge

– Opportunities to grow

Now compare the two.

What’s working that you want to protect? What’s missing that might be tweaked?

That’s where change often begins: not with a dramatic shift, but with honest reflection.

Shift the question, change the pressure

What matters most is intention: being mindful about the choices you make. Checking in with yourself about whether your current situation is good enough for now. And being honest about what’s missing—or what might need a small adjustment—so your work can still feel engaging and sustainable.

That’s what I’ll dive into in my next post: how micro-pivots, small intentional shifts, can help you feel more aligned in your role, even without a big leap.

Where are you with this now? What would a wise, intentional next step look like for you - not your ideal self, but your real-life self right now?

About me

I'm Nelli, counseling psychologist and career coach based in Abu Dhabi, offering online coaching for clients around the world. I help people find that tricky balance between being content with where they are and still keeping an eye on what’s possible. It’s a tension many of us feel—and something I support clients with every day.